Happiness Tips and Techniques: Finding Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment

December 5, 2008 – 6:50 pm

In the new bestseller book “Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment,” Author and Harvard Professor Tal Ben-Shahar refers to 4 styles for how we tend to lead our lives.

1) Hedonist: Present benefit that causes future detriment.
A hedonist focuses on enjoying the present while ignoring potential negative consequences of his/her actions.

2) Rat Racer: Present sacrifice for future benefit.

Rat racers enslave themselves to the present in pursuit of a better future. They are masters of delaying gratification.

3) Nihilist: Present sacrifice that causes future detriment.

Nihilists have lost their love for life. A Nihilist, according to Tal Ben-Shahar, neither enjoys the moment nor has a sense of future purpose.

4) Happier: Present benefit that causes future benefit.

Happy people live according to the knowledge that activities can bring enjoyment in the present and lead to a fulfilling future.

The 4 styles can be summarized simply:

Happiness Now, Suffering Later
Suffering Now, Happiness Later
Suffering Now, Suffering Later
Happiness Now, Happiness Later

The MILLION DOLLAR Question….

Which style do you spend most of your time in?

Do you feel part of the rat race? (That is, never reaching the proverbial ‘pot of gold’?)

Have you ever lived as a hedonist? (What were the costs and benefits of living this way?)

Have you ever felt nihilistic? (Were you unable to see beyond your current pain?)

Finally, think about HAPPINESS–a time when you pursued both present and future benefit!

And Here’s an EXERCISE to Start Feeling Happier…

Spend 15 minutes a day for 4 days and write about your experiences living in each of the 4 styles (most of us spend at least some time in each).

Explain the behaviors you engaged in, the emotions you experienced during the behaviors, and the emotions you felt after the positive or negative consequences of your behaviors.

Repeat the exercise twice for the Happiness style, and consider how you can live by the Happiness style more often.

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