Overcoming Workaholism: Counseling Information on Workaholism and Tips for Achieving Balance
October 20, 2008 – 5:20 pmPORTRAITS
Henry can’t even recall the last time he felt he was able to truly relax. What he can recall, however, just how difficult it was for him growing up in poverty. All he seems to care about these days is ensuring that he does not have to experience those struggles ever again. He constantly worries that if he stops working so hard, then he will lose everything that he has established for himself.
Marie can’t get herself to slow down. She is constantly picking up after her two children, cooking, and cleaning in attempt to main her spotless household. Unfortunately, she can never actually enjoy her home and family as a result.
DEFINITIONS & KEY THOUGHTS
Workaholism occurs when one does not maintain a healthy balance between their work and the other contexts of their life (i.e., marriage, family, community). For workaholics, work is their principal avenue for finding success, approval, and respect.
For many in today’s society, workaholism has become a powerful obsession. It is a health-robbing, sleep-depriving, and greed-festering addiction and should be recognized as so. However, it is a problem that continues to go unchallenged- and often even rewarded- in many cases.
Workaholism is important to realize that workaholism is not only an issue for men and women in the workplace, but also for those who strive to have the “perfect” family and home.
Symptoms of workaholism may include: inability to rest; a constant sense of urgency in every activity; working 60 to 70 hours a week or more; a need for acceptance or significance in the eyes others through one’s work; viewing work stress as a challenge to overcome or a means to finding significance; problems with rigidity, self-image, or with intimacy in relationships; valuing performance over showing grace and love; being seen by others as irritable, without humor, inattentive, or always in a hurry; and worrying more about providing financial security and a better lifestyle than about the emotional demands of family.
Generally, those who are addicted to work feel a compulsive need to do everything perfectly and better than others, that their worth can only be measure through their achievements, pain from their past, self-critical, and a deep sense of emptiness. They constantly struggle with their pride, believing that they must measure up to the impossible standards that they have set for themselves. Lastly, they believe that others view their constant and selfless work as being honorable.
ACTION STEPS
When helping a person to overcome workaholism, it is important to avoid using any evaluative remarks. Communicate unconditional love and affirm the individual’s inner qualities and bravery in addressing their problem. Express empathy to the individual regarding the stress that they are under and reassure them that they will find a way through the pressure. Because the individual may not be aware why they are under such stress and may not be fond of self-reflection, it may be necessary to encourage them to explore what factors could be contributing to their workaholism. In doing so, it may be helpful to move the focus from the individual to what they feel they must to in order to be accepted by others. Reassure them that others are concerned with who the individual is, rather than what or how much they do.
The following action steps can be followed when helping someone to overcome workaholism:
1. Assess the problem. Determine why the individual feels the stress they do at work. Help them to understand that workaholism is truly an addiction and that it must be treated as such.
2. Evaluate the past. Identify any negative massage that the individual has received regarding their self-worth.
3. Find a balance. Evaluate the individual’s weekly schedule and filter out any unnecessary involvements that are contributing to the individual’s addiction to working. Encourage the individual to find a balance between work, family, and other relationships by having them “schedule” times for play and leisure. Emphasize the importance of treating these times as a priority. Explore different ways that the individual can incorporate enjoyable activities into their schedule.
4. Slow down. Assist the individual in establishing a slower pace for each day. Remind them the importance of sufficient rest, exercise, and eating right.
5. Get support. Encourage the individual to seek help for a group or counselor. Remind them that all change takes time.
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